Remember Volunteering For This?

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LOOKING AT THE ASCENSION PROCESS & LIGHT-WORKING FROM THE OTHER DIRECTION

One afternoon in the early 1980′s I had a sudden intense memory surface within my Denise consciousness. Because this memory happened before the start of the Ascension Process (1987), it was unusually intense for me to make a fully conscious quantum connection with this particular memory—more accurately the actual event happening simultaneously. During the minute or so of my remembering and seeing in my mind’s eye this simultaneous quantum event, I instantaneously had sweat running down my back and was shaking mildly from the conscious connection with this higher, larger aspect of myself. That’s how much more difficult it was some thirty years ago to make a conscious quantum connection with a very high dimension and aspect of SELF like this. I—not just this Denise aspect but many other aspects of my greater SELF also—was/am aware of existing simultaneously in multiple forms in multiple dimensions. Here’s what I suddenly remembered that special day thirty years ago.

Suddenly I was aware of being a Being of Light that exists vibrationally closer to Source with a small group of other like-Beings or Spiritual Family. There were maybe five or so of these similar Beings standing in front of the rest of us like-Beings. We’d gathered together to discuss something very important and make equally important decisions about it. I was one of the Beings listening to the other Beings informing the rest of us about these situations and the changes needed.

The short discussion consisted of us being informed that THE Plan needed help from some of us to be corrected, separated, completed, and lifted up to an entirely new level and dimension. That was all that needed to be understood or discussed because it was instantaneously known by all of us what was happening, what would happen, what was needed and why. At this point I raised my hand and announced, “We’ll go!” and that was that. That’s all that was required to volunteer to seed an aspect of one’s Greater SELF to incarnate within lower frequency 3D on Earth as a Starseed Lightworker/Lightworker/Wayshower/Path Cutter to work from within that dimension and Earth world disguised as a local to seed, embody, and manifest the transformational energies of the Ascension Process.

To take this topic one more quantum step—which we must to be completely honest about this—if your Greater Self volunteered for this current Ascension Mission, then this part of You didn’t seed and send out only one aspect of You to do this, You most likely seeded many aspects and deliberately sent them to incarnate in different timelines and countries around Earth (aka your “past lives”). Why? Because it was/is a quantum crash-course in learning about living and functioning within polarized 3D physicality; living, perceiving and functioning within dense polarized male and female physical bodies; existing, functioning and perceiving within greatly restricted linear time; and learning to function with greatly restricted awareness and consciousness etc.

SPHERICAL OR QUANTUM BEING AND CONSCIOUSNESS

When this call went out for volunteers to help with dislodging humanity and Earth up and out from the dark mud-pit it had fallen into thanks to some other stubborn and confused aspects—aka the Dark Ones—YOU intentionally seeded different aspects of Yourself to incarnate on 3D Earth to all work on this particular Mission simultaneously. I know, I know, just breath and don’t think linear thoughts and linear time! Let your sense of self, selves, Self expand back to what it really is which is NOT linear and separated at all.

The Greater Self You volunteered to help with getting THE Plan back on-track and to accomplish this It seeded aspects of Itself into…let’s say…Lemuria, Atlantis, ancient Egypt, ancient China, Asia, north, central, and south America as native Indians, Mayans etc., Tibet, India, north and south Africa, different countries and timelines throughout Europe and so on. And It seeded these different aspects of Itself into these different countries and timelines in both male and female bodies so that as much knowledge, learning, creativity and integration could be gained. (Think spherical not linear.)

In many of these past/simultaneous lives you were trained by other Master Teachers, other Starbeings and by other-dimensional Beings (who in some cases where also other aspects of You as well) all to help the overall quantum Mission and teach these different incarnated aspects of You the things you/You/YOU all needed/need to know from firsthand experience within the third dimension and polarized physicality. How could you possibly help anyone or anything if you/You/YOU didn’t know what it’s like living in a dense physical body with limited consciousness in a profoundly polarized physical world? So, crash-course to learn, to live, taste, feel, to know for yourself/selves how and why and all the in’s and out’s of a life in 3D. And because You have inserted aspects of Self within this Earth world and THE Plan, you’re not breaking any universal Freewill Laws by making the needed Ascension-related changes. Now the many different you’s have some serious personal knowledge tools to work with during the last leg of this quantum Mission, plus no one’s Freewill has been infringed upon either.

So here comes the real mind-bender with all this. Breath, expand your sense of self and relax.

This current incarnation, this current life you aspect is the really, really important volunteer piece in this massive elaborate quantum Mission. I know it doesn’t seem like you are and it sure as hell doesn’t feel like you are, but you are nonetheless. This current self you and incarnation is the real anchor aspect to all this; the real incarnation body/mind/soul that’s the one living, transmuting, and embodying within the Ascension, the “End Times”, the end of the 16 billion-yearlong Plan timeline to actually do the deed of Ascension through yourself, your bodies, your heart and soul. All the rest of it has been, is, quantum prep-work and support for this particular aspect of You in this life, this incarnation and timeline to wrap this Mission up and bring it home, Home, HOME.

Many years ago I read something channeled by Barbara Marciniak’s Pleiadians. They called us Starseeds/Lightworkers/”System Busters” the “Standard Bearers of our Souls”. When I first read that term I wasn’t positive of what they meant by it. A few weeks later I totally understood. We are indeed the aspects that are embodying and living the Alchemical Ascension Process and 16 billion-yearlong polarity resolution transformational work within and through our current bodies and selves to get THE Plan back on-track and provide a way out of the old stuck mud-pit Earth now for any who wish to extricate themselves from the endless negativity, darkness, polarity, violence, suffering, greed, lack, pain and tears.

Let your greater quantum identity and volunteered role sink in a bit and go have a bowl of ice cream or something and cut yourself some slack. Is it any wonder why so many of us are exhausted beyond comprehension at this point? Well done everyone and just a little way left to go now.

Denise

July 9, 2011

teal copyright Copyright © Denise Le Fay and TRANSITIONS, 2011–2014. All Rights Reserved. You may copy and redistribute this material so long as you do not alter it in any way, the content remains complete, credit is given to the author and you include this copyright notice and live link. http://deniselefay.wordpress.com/

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45 thoughts on “Remember Volunteering For This?

  1. Denise, thank you for this timely reminder of my remembering process. I’ve been in a funk for days, tired, fed up, weary to the bones. And all I want is out.of.here….. I’ve been hammered, pounded, tossed from loss to loss, and I’m just tired. So, I’ve been a bit whiney…. all to the distress of my closest friends! Somehow this is a comfort, although it doesn’t solve my lack of enthusiasm. Guess I need a real break from this 3D “life” I’m stuck in….. or maybe a glass or two of wine might help?? LOL — love and light, and keep up the reminders system. It continually reminds me that I’m not alone <3

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    • Jane Waters,

      Glass of wine, bowl of ice cream, bitchin’, crying, whining…it’s all allowed. :) We’d loose our everluvin’ minds and hearts otherwise.

      Heart Hugs,
      Denise

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  2. Hi Denise:

    Just found your web site and I am very glad I did. I get exactly what you’re saying and you confirm for me what I thought of a couple of years ago and made me kind of shudder to think of it, but that thought was, “I am my Higher Self”. Kind of made me lonely for a long time, but now I realize that I’m doing one hell of a good job for all of me/Me/ME and so accept your invitation to have that bowl of ice-cream, though champagne might more appropriate. It’s great to have your web site to help handle the load. Love to all/All/ALL

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  3. Denise, I loved this ~ the depth of it, somehow, just Feels Right. :) a book that helped me along similar lines to this direction, is called “Infinite Mind: Science of the Human Vibrations of Consciousness”, by Valerie V. Hunt – and in this, she speaks to the recovery of All our previous lives incarnations Memories, into a singular lifetime, where we then can access all of that work towards wisdom ~ she discusses that this process is organic, and varies with the individual, and there is no one “road map” to linking into that pool of knowledge, but it IS possible to do ~ so your description of linking into a … plethora of other aspects/ incarnations hits home. Also, we carry much of this linkage in our “vibrational field” – a sphere of energy that hovers around our physical body – and as we share time and activities with others, they too can inherently ‘learn from’ our fields, just by being nearby ~ no discussion is needed as the field is about energy and wavelength ~
    Thanks for your writings, very inspiring! all of us ‘slogging thru’ hopefully will start to come into the peace and ease I sense is quickly approaching ~ ice cream therapy is allowed! :) being kind to yourself and others is part of the unfolding process

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  4. OMG denise,

    i had a similar experience with a memory of my volunteering. so i do get exactly what you have said. btw, i also have been a whiny little monkey for the last few days and was completely at my wits end yesterday. I was done. today’s a new day and the newsletter was an nice boost. thanks
    gabe
    btw, there were 4!!! c-class solar flares yesterday

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  5. Fascinating Denise. Is it possible to have lives in the same “linear timeline”? A few years ago, my husband and I were in Portland, Oregon. We discovered a neighborhood which we were both much drawn to. I clearly felt in an altered state. We wondered around in shops and markets; when we went into a bar, people there knew us. They were excited, saying: “haven’t seen you in so long!” We had never been there before. These people were clearly confused when we said so. Very Twilight Zone. Denise, what was that?

    Gerry

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    • Gerry,

      Some of these type of experiences aren’t “past lives” but probable realities. Example: in this life you and your husband decide to NOT move to…let’s say…South Carolina but remain living in Arizona where you’ve both lived for decades together. Then one year you go on vacation to South Carolina and wander into some town that feels remarkably familiar to you both. Then some long-term SC residents see you and your husband and mistake you for the probable reality you’s that DID decide to move to SC twenty-five years earlier. Just because these versions of “us” in these current lives make decisions to NOT do certain things doesn’t mean other aspects of “us” don’t sometimes branch off and do do those things.

      Jane Roberts who channeled the Seth books talked about “probable realities” and it’s fascinating material. I too have had people in one city I’d never been to in my life be convinced that I was someone else that they knew very well. It’s a weird experience for sure. Thanks for sharing your experience. :)

      Hugs,
      Denise

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  6. Many of us across this blue-green sphere must be asking wtf we are doing here, because I get at a reminder nearly every day now. I have been asking this question for years, but rarely got the responses so consistently and definitively as I have of late. Thank you Denise for giving the response even more clarity. Good to know that we have many aspects of our best intentions at work on the project. Somehow makes me feel less tired. ;0)

    This was in my mailbox yesterday and I think I have read it at least five times. Each time I laugh a little harder:

    “You do know, of course,
    why you’re here – don’t you?

    Because you couldn’t resist the challenge.

    Nothing in all creation, not in any sphere of the Universe,
    compares to being born into time and space
    without any recollection of your past;
    having to find your own way when lost,
    your own courage when frightened,
    and the infinite powers at your disposal when challenged;
    left to the elements to rediscover your supremacy over them;
    driven by your passions so that you might rise
    above your humble, naked beginnings,
    and ultimately see through the illusions that had trapped you.
    To find yourself, once again, high upon the throne
    of thy kingdom come from whence it all began.

    Either that, or you were dared…

    Notes From The Universe
    (www.tut.com)

    Wishing comfort, humor, ice cream and champagne for all humanity!

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    • Lamplighter,

      Oh that was just wonderful! Thanks for sharing it and a link. Especially loved this line…

      “…left to the elements to rediscover your supremacy over them;”

      Gratitude,
      Denise

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  7. Well I’m pleased to say I’ve made it. Though durning the 80′s no one believed there was any making it back for me, and as I was handcuffed and brought into the court for about the 5th time that year..I said I just can’t go on. I was not living in this reality but many, weaving out of life times and still knowing it was happening.
    It started in 82′(from college to business) and ended in 86′(to living on the streets with the street people) as I began to make it back from hell I said for every step I take I’ll take a thousand people with me.And I have…. It has been 25 years of healing…that was my life healing.
    But oh the Spritual gifts that came with it. I’m tired as all of you, but after the last 2 1/2 years another attempt to take me down again,,”They” just couldn’t do it not even close.
    It feels like time to rest,renew…ritual and then perhaps a bit of joy and a deep breathe.
    What a Fucking Ride…..What a Fucking Ride.
    But I’m here fairly sane, and now there asking me to come forth and teach on a whole new level.
    What stayed with me today was Denise’s understand the 5th dimension has arrived…Hala-fucking-luya (Not know if that’s a word). I have so many battle scares that I don’t know what will surfice for the surviving.
    But maybe it’s the last word…I carry my honor, my truth and intergrity as a badge of courage into the World.
    Thank you Denise and thank all of you who have born this journey.
    Who would have believed..Way Shower
    Cheri

    P.S. The new teaching transiting the 4th to the 5th dimension. That’s why I had to let the warrior go it’s more of a co-creating then fighting…boy that’s new.
    Again able to manifest what is needed. A little scary right now..could this be real.
    I’ll be here as long as they need my work then over to the other side to see my dear beloved who passed away 2 years ago, although he has said as the veils lift I will be able to see him and connect.
    I’ll go eat the ice cream now…it truly is a celebration.
    CHeri

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  8. Wow! I was really surprised when i saw you had posted a message as i had said i was not getting on the computer today but i was led here.. I have felt so disoriented, confused and scattered yesterday and today that i said i need to hear something that resonates with me to let me know what to make of this right about now and so i come here first and here you are..Much Love to You!!!

    I too remember volunteering and in the early 1980′s think it was 1981 a bright light came in the room where i was praying in the wee hours of the morning. It was very unusual because for some odd reason i felt impelled to pray/speak to Source-God. It was unusual too that i would get out of bed rather than silently speak as usual and especially it being about 3:00 am in the morning and also odd that i would leave my husband in bed to go completely into another room.. Well, as i sat there praying this bright light came through and i heard this voice, sounded outer but it was inner and very loud.. Needless to say it scared me silly as i was in the depth of a mind controlling religion and had been taught that voices were from the Devil/Demons..Anyway i audibly asked the voice “What is it Lord” and the response was “I have a work for you to do” and the light stayed a few seconds more and disappeared.. It would be many years before i understood what had really happened and what the work would be as i am continuing to learn much now, thank You Denise for your share!!!
    On a side note in 1984 i started what that religion calls Pioneering, where you spend a given amount of hours each month in door-door or some other method speaking to people about the religion and for the next 10 years till 1995 i pioneered spending 90 hours a month doing so, and of course i though this was the work i had heard about from spirit vision in 1981..I am a Pioneer! Yes! Surely was not so then in religion and boy have i grown much from that time….

    Albeit, i learned when i left the religion after some 25+ years i finally got to know why i was there, nothing like living the experience to have walked in it personally and speak from personal knowledge..Organized religion has made one big stench on the earth as most of everything else here however the vast of the teachings, beliefs, etc are rooted in lies set forth by religion so that system has to be toppled-remember Ghost Busters? So to along with all the rest..I find it so wonderful now to know that being locked in that religion was simply a tool to a locked door that i had the keys to and would use later…I know me coming in as Sagittarius which is religious sign has to do with religion and it’s end. I was born on the 10th of December which 10 means completion and my Life Path number is 9 which means endings so endings and completions as you say are here for us now.. I see so many people are instantly turned off by religion because of the hypocrisy and so much more so your being used to bring the information in a secular way is wonderful as you do not have the religion indoctrination to overcome, but of course whatever we have as we know is tools to use to get us HOME!!

    There is a daycare next door to where i live and many of the boys have bible names and when they go on the playground i hear the workers calling Jeremiah, Isaiah and others i forget..Yesterday as i set on the back porch i heard her call Isaiah really, really loud so i said my he must be doing something really serious, so today Denise when i started reading your message i knew instantly why i had heard her call Isaiah so loud as in the Bible at Isaiah 6:8 it says “Here I am send Me” Also i immediately recognized your words as a meal/feeding as you mentioned giving information–in the bible there are ones chosen by source-God in spirit who are referred to as Domestics-in house servant who are to give the other members/domestics(in house servants) of the household the proper food/information at the proper time…
    So ironic i say as i end how i had a dream in early morning with me sitting on this very wide marble staircase where everything was so white, light and bright and i worked as a domestic in the household..

    Love and Many Hugs for all you do!
    Avian

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  9. Hi Denise, your comments emails arent coming though still? Just thought i’d let you know.
    I dont remeber signing up for this, if i did i musta been mad! :) J.x

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  10. Hi Denise,

    Everything that you write feels good. I just found your website now. These days I am very tired also due the operation I had on friday and took a biopsy. Anyway….I just wished they moved along…I am also tired of 3D realm and it makes it harder when I am half in3D and half 5D, especcially during the night. I am Clairsentient. Thanks for the uplifting anwser.
    I also follow Zingdad ascension papers and asked 8, one of the spiritual beings what deja-vu is?

    8 wrote: Just as the contents of your dreams can actually be one of many things, so to can the experience you have called “déjà-vu”. Though there are a number of reasons you might experience this I will highlight the most common and the most relevant to the ascending soul. It is the realisation that time is an illusion. There really is no such thing. All time is NOW. All places are HERE. There is really only NOW HERE. Or NOWHERE. But you are experiencing a very powerful illusion that there is indeed time and space. That there is a “previous” and a “later” and that there is a “here” and a “there”. But your Inner-Self has a much less powerful version of this illusion. Your Inner-Self sees your entire life, from beginning to end as one thing and as Right Now. It also sees all your alternate “possible and probable lifetimes as Right Now. The lifetime you are observing is only a small part of the greater picture which is You. But before I digress. Before you incarnated you spent some time in preparation for this lifetime. You reviewed some of the events you would be experiencing. Sometimes déjà-vu occurs when you remember something you knew would be coming… and here it is! Sometimes déjà-vu is when your consciousness and the consciousness of your Inner-Self draw nearer to each other. You become aware that the things that you are experiencing are all already created. You are simply the part of self that is navigating that which was already created.

    These are complex subjects and can be hard to comprehend for those that are inside the illusion of the 3D realm. My suggestion therefore is to simply enjoy the moment as being one which you are sharing with your Inner-Self.

    Wish you lots of love,light and JOY.

    http://lisasgeomagic.blogspot.com/

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  11. Oh, Denise, thank you! You are WONDERFUL!
    Whilst I have been perfectly ok with the concept of parallel lives, I’ve been mulling over the concept of “karma” for the past few weeks, not quite getting my head around it. I was just formulating a question about it, in case you’d like to give me some input to clarify my thoughts, and then you post this :D Your timing couldn’t be any more perfect!

    The idea of karma has always bothered me in its linear explanation, ie. you do something in one life and need to correct it in the next etc. But your post here gave me a startling revelation – so it must be, I assume, for Lightworkers at least (?) who incarnate in different timelines simultaneously, that if one aspect of the soul in one timeline acts on a decision that’s non-loving, ie. would “incur karma”, then the other aspects in other timelines work to correct it… and when the energies of such a situation has been transmuted, then that particular “karmic” issue has been corrected? This would answer SO many of my recent years’ experiences. Several simultaneous lives have been shown to me in much detail, clearly for me to transmute. In some ways this year, 2011, I’ve consciously even started to “oversee” all of my soul fragments that incarnate here together to help. It feels like I’ve been lifting the energy of the whole group of my own should fragments… and that, in part, has contributed to how difficult the past few years have been. It’s like in some timelines the energy is so horrifically thick and low that the soul aspect of me that incarnated there, has lost much of the memory of his/her soul connection and it is my task to make contact and help them…

    Denise, if you could shed any further light over my pondering about karmic issues, I’d be most grateful. I’m also trying to understand the general structure of everything in the 3D existence, what the karmic wheel is, how it functions(functioned?) when the Darks are/were recycling souls for their own energy source… I have many questions I guess :)

    I feel & know clearly that I volunteered. That idea in itself gives me much strength. I died to my previous life in the end of last year, after that horrific November, and since then, I have known without a shadow of a doubt that I’m here only for work now. I aim for nothing anymore, in terms of personal ambition, I just go where I’m shown and do what I’m asked by my Higher Self. It’s a completely different outlook on life and being in the world now, at times I pine after how things were, but there sure isn’t going back now.

    Also, regarding you comment about the parallel realities of this lifetime. This also is a realisation to me… In the end of 1998 I was presented by a big choice. It would have involved a move to another country from the beginning of 1999 plus different type of work (a tempting opportunity), and it was a VERY probable timeline indeed, I almost saw myself living in it… Even now I often wonder how my life might have been had I made that choice -yet I know in my High Heart that at the time I chose right for my soul purpose. But in 2012 I have been invited for a visit, travelling to that particular place, to meet those particular people who initiated the original offer in 1998 and now, reading your post, I’m very intrigued as to how it will all go… (if I’m still here by then, heheh!) How fascinating.

    ~*~with much Gratitude~*~

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    • Mia,

      The most important thing for all of us to grasp, especially now as we complete the 16 billion-yearlong cycle or THE Plan (Mayan calendar showing this completion point or Expiration Date of Oct. 28, 2011), is that we’re more than linear beings; we’re quantum beings that exist within multiple dimensions, multiple worlds, multiple incarnations, in multiple levels of development/consciousness etc. simultaneously.

      Each of us are like huge, complex networks that are connected to all of its other parts and aspects with the Higher Self at the center of everything. The reason I’ve been pushing this particular information and concepts is because they go along with our evolution/ascension out of dense 3D physicality with profoundly narrow linear time consciousness/awareness only, into 5D NON-linear reality with increasingly unified, non-polarized, more quantum consciousness/awareness within a much more vast and fluid dimension (5D). In other words, one natural side-effect of ascension (the Body and Brian Rewiring) is that our sense of “self” and time must evolve and expand much more than what we’ve believed and perceived it has been.

      About karma. Like everything else from the old lower 3D world and awareness, karma for many people simply became an Eastern version of Western sin and punishment. Karma isn’t about “good/bad” or “right/wrong”. It’s an energetic way to teach or remind us that all is connected and all is learning and evolving constantly. It’s not that we’ve done something “wrong” and now will have to “pay” for our evil ways or lack of understanding or selfishness or whatever it may be. It’s about us learning within a realm of polarity. and learning within polarity means we get to experience BOTH sides of an energy, issues, beliefs, actions and so on. And all the while the many aspects of us are learning from each other and making changes, progress, evolving and learning simultaneously.

      “It feels like I’ve been lifting the energy of the whole group of my own should fragments… and that, in part, has contributed to how difficult the past few years have been. It’s like in some timelines the energy is so horrifically thick and low that the soul aspect of me that incarnated there, has lost much of the memory of his/her soul connection and it is my task to make contact and help them…”

      Yes, this is very true and another reason why we’re so exhausted at this point within the Ascension Process. Remember too that we’re transmuting, completing, and wrapping up 16 billion years worth of everything which is hard to even comprehend…let alone do! :| All is connected and constantly learning and evolving and this is what our current incarnations are very much about.

      Hugs,
      Denise

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  12. Denise – you said

    “Are you going to continue waiting for others to define reality for you, or are you going to get with the real program that the Ascension Process is and live it yourself, see it yourself, experience it yourself all on your own? New responsibilities coming for more and more people throughout the second-half of the Ninth Wave; are you ready to do it yourself, or are you still waiting for some external event/events and/or governmental or religious people to continue defining reality for you?”

    Thank you – this was a confront to me – to realize I was giving my power away to the illusion – something I try to keep on top of! So, yes, I was waiting – waiting for “disclosure” of the reality of aliens, of the reality of ascension – instead of living it. I am going to define what 5D will be like for me and start living it. No more waiting for others to put it in ‘black and white’ – just live it. While I’m sure my perception will change, probably from day to day, no more waiting for some outside authority – I am my own. Thank you and everyone else here for sharing your/their process!

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    • Debra,

      The negatives (Dark Ones in all their forms) want everyone to continue believing they need and require something, someone, a group of someone’s to save/rescue/fix/define reality for them because they cannot do it themselves. That is the opposite of the Ascension Process which is all about people taking responsibility for their own consciousness and abilities and becoming more empowered etc. The negatives don’t want humanity strong and capable of thinking for themselves, doing for themselves and each other, and consciously embodying more and more. But to ascend/evolve now that’s exactly what people must do individually. Well done you! :)

      Hugs,
      Denise

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  13. I feel useless, wasting away. I feel broken, incapable of doing this “human thing” correctly. I feel every pain, every atrocity inflicted on this world and everything that breathes, and it’s brought me to my knees, drenched with tears because I feel like I’m letting God and my spiritual siblings down. I feel like the position I took in volunteering could have been used by someone who is actually capable of this task. Apparently, the strength and determination in my mind is much stronger than what actually exists, and now, I don’t believe my mind anymore either. Even my sleep dreams, my meditations, my visions are confusing and contradictory. I feel paralyzed. Just when I feel I’m on the right track something comes along to de-rail me. Just do this and just do that… like telling an addict to “just stop”. When someone is gripped by something, it’s called addiction or possession, and assistance and support are imperative because if a person could break free on their own, they wouldn’t be addicted, possessed, or gripped in the first place. This is how I feel; encased, bound and blindfolded. The thing is, I don’t feel better after meditating, I don’t feel better after talking to my higher Self/Source. I can’t seem to find a way to uplift myself or to just feel better. So yes, I am looking for something, someone to help me, help me. Daily, I look for messages, indications to help me find my way, and other days, to simply just cope. I am writing this to you because my name too is Debra and my spouse’s name is Denise, and I see that as a possibility of being synchronistic, perhaps leading to…?

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    • Debra,

      Please hear what I’m going to say next.

      Every word you said is how I feel, how I’ve felt for years and years now. Honestly, I’m as beat up, as exhausted, as fed up with the shit and insanity and my not even being able to move to another town and see some fucking trees! All this pressure and feelings of being trapped in between the old world and the new is just about driving me crazy right now. Tomorrow’s another day however and, as usual, I find some small space within myself (that was the key to this situation at this moment) that feels somewhat content within this Process. Then the shit returns with a vengeance and I have to find that inner High Heart zone again and again and again. It’s another freakin’ Initiation and some days I’m golden, and other day or minutes I’m a (I just loved this line by someone else here) ” a whiny little monkey” for a while!

      This next bit is probably gonna sound like fluffy new age bullshit but hang in with me okay? ;) Sometimes us laying on the floor crying, exhausted beyond comprehension, done done done with it all is the magical moment and indicator that – ONCE AGAIN – we’ve gotten so freakin’ fed up with whatever that we finally just let go of…which was what we needed to do all along! Harsh but true. The Ascension Process hammers us repeatedly which eventually causes us to let go of another and another and another old lower frequency aspect of ourselves, our ego selves, our beliefs, our dreams, our awareness, our habits etc.

      The Ascension Process literally happens in stages and phases like the tides coming in and out:

      1) Higher frequency energy/energies waves come in which effect us in multiple ways and typically hurts like all hell.
      2) That Energy Wave ends to give us time to adapt and adjust to the latest NEW energies and how they’ve changed us internally/externally.
      3) Because of #1 and #2 we now literally exist in a slightly higher, more Light-filled energy level (those stair steps I’m always mentioning)
      4) For a short period we float around in the latest NEW state/place/level/energies and it feels pristine and quiet in comparison.
      5) Next this process starts all over again with #1!!!

      Yesterday I got hit hard with what it sounds like you’re being hit with too. (Uranus turned retrograde yesterday at 5 Aries and that’s causing much of what we’re currently feeling. Turning inward again to do more inner excavating.) I’ve been a bitchy “whiny little monkey” fed up entirely with so much that I can’t seem to change in my life (moving, getting into Nature, living away from people etc). This too shall pass as it always does, but it’s a big pain and frustration while here!

      Us living this Process is us doing it. It’s often not what we think or believe it is; it’s hard, dirty, ugly, painful, uncool looking, miserable, heartbreaking spiritual work. Those times, those phases where you/me/all of us are on the floor and at the end of our ropes is the Alchemical process at it’s finest and most transformational moments. Again, harsh but true. I’d like you to just know that you are doing it, that you’ve been doing it all along…that’s why it feels like it does to this current aspect of you. You are not required to do anything else than what you’ve already been doing/living/being all along.

      You are Loved and Respected more than you know, :)
      Denise

      Like

  14. Denise, your posts keep getting richer and deeper. This one is so profound it is literally jaw dropping. This one post alone explains better than the thousand other posts I’ve read over the years regarding what the hell we are doing here. I am greatly appreciative of your sharing this wisdom. Namaste.

    Like

    • Linda Lubin,

      And I am greatly appreciative of your recognizing what I’ve shared. Truly, deeply.

      I know I’m now supposed to be sharing more fifth dimensional information primarily to consciously introduce more people to quantum consciousness and being. We’re evolving out of linear time and consciousness and as those old 3D blinkers fall off, we’ve got to know that our “reality” is going to increase tremendously. As consciousness expands, so too does reality, and we’re teetering on the brink of this now in the second-half of 2011 and beyond and there needs to be more discussion about some of these 5D traits and abilities.

      Thank you again…I needed to hear what you said right now. :)

      Heart Hugs of Gratitude,
      Denise

      Like

  15. Thank you Denise, I posted a very similar message to our mini group just earlier that morning, its great so many of us are ready to shift now.

    My friend next to me just said ” Now I know why I was always reluctant to raise my hand in class even when I knew the answer!”

    Patricia

    Like

  16. Yesterday I was watching Saving Private Ryan again. Noticed something hadn’t noticed before. Towards the end of the movie the team runs low on ammo and energy. They’ve gone thru the unspeakable horror (and enormous victory) of landing at Normandy and now they’re trying to run the bad guys out of some little french town but they are weary to the bone. Tom Hanks tells them here’s what we’re gonna do: we’re going to make shitty bombs. The men just stare at him. He tells them how to make the bombs. If I understood correctly what they’re gonna do is shit in their socks, tie up the socks with rope, put axle grease and some other combustible material on the outside of the socks, light the rope and launch the socks like grenades. This works. They take out bad guy tanks and lots of bad guys. It’s all very explosive and clearing and cleansing. Hanks is fatally wounded but he lives to see the air force planes finally finally show up and give the team cover and vanquish the rest of the enemy and save Ryan and everyone else.

    We have the tools! And we’re learning when to fight and when to let go and let our higher selves take over.

    Denise is like Tom Hanks and the air cavalry as far as I’m concerned. NOT a savior! A huge helper.

    Like

  17. Denise, thank you for your explaination of the Ascension Process. I generally don’t get to excited by the ways things are going becuase they keep shifting, but when I saw the possibilty of something coming forward and it did I became very excited,
    It hasn’t changed but I have, afraid to believe.
    Any idea where things will remain in 5D reality, or does it continue to change for a while.
    After what I have been trhough in the last 2 years I need something to hold on to.Ha LOL
    Thanks, Cheri

    Like

  18. Denise said

    “I know I’m now supposed to be sharing more fifth dimensional information primarily to consciously introduce more people to quantum consciousness and being. We’re evolving out of linear time and consciousness and as those old 3D blinkers fall off, we’ve got to know that our “reality” is going to increase tremendously. As consciousness expands, so too does reality, and we’re teetering on the brink of this now in the second-half of 2011 and beyond and there needs to be more discussion about some of these 5D traits and abilities.”

    So looking forward to this! Am finding very little information about what this process is like now, not 5 or 10 years ago. Loved what you said before about the etherial building and about the beings flashing their head shots at us.

    Like

  19. Denise

    Thank you for an amazing post. When I read

    At this point I raised my hand and announced, “We’ll go!” and that was that.

    I couldn’t hold back the tears. It moved me from a deep place of knowing that is exactly what I said and have continued to say through-out my journey. The crazy part is I feel like don’t know what the hell I am doing. I’m just doing it. It feels like I’m doing it blindly but at the same time I know that I am right on track. tough gig.

    This current incarnation, this current life you aspect is the really, really important volunteer piece in this massive elaborate quantum Mission.

    This makes perfect sense to me. Lately I’ve had the thought that perhaps I am the most evolved version of me incarnated in 3d- perhaps that is why the current me hijacked my past life, meaning from 2006, and I am now living a completely different life. (Lisa Renee says that 2006 was the final clarion call to for all indigos to wake up and get prepared and boy did I get the wake- up call in a harsh way!!)

    Mia

    So many parts of your comment resonated with me.

    Lately I have been consciously “going back” or forward or wherever I am going to collect my fragmented parts and have been helping those parts that are stuck or caught. A memory surfaces in my mind like a still photograph of a point in my life and I know that I must go back to that place and time to help that aspect of me become conscious and join me in this timeline. I usually just go back in my mind like a visualisation and stay there until the feeling is complete. In essence I feel I am making myself whole again.

    In the end of 1998 I was presented by a big choice.

    I also felt that I was presented with a huge choice at the end of 2009 to pursue a dream of mine but I said no and am now living that decision. It is still painful as I’ve had so much trouble letting that childhood dream go and feel it slipping away and I also wonder what that life would be like.

    In terms of personal ambition, as an Aries, this is a topic I struggle with. I also feel like I am not here to pursue my dreams but to do specific work. I am trying to balance ‘my work’ AND pursue worldly things/goals to give myself something to focus on and make my choices and create my own reality but I am not attached to the outcomes. I’m going to give it my best shot but I will not be surprised if, like everything else, it is taken from me with the lesson that – you volunteered for something else and that is not part of The Plan.

    Like

  20. Funny I just posted this on fb
    -
    Take the opportunity to acknowledge and include in your heart the place in you that feels weak, exhausted, divided and over-extended, low in self-esteem because you feel that “you” have to do it all.

    Like

  21. To the other Debra ~ It was just a very short time ago I felt just like you ~ I could have written the same post ~ do hang in, it does and it will get better. And it comes and goes, and I will probably be there again soon. And like Denise said, for me when I am trying too hard I “give up” which is just what I needed to do ~ Right now feeling pretty good ~ then realized I had yet another layer to peel away ~ giving my power away ~ waiting to hear that “yes, this really is real” instead of owning it myself.

    Like

  22. One quick question – Denise/anyone – I got an email tonight about something called “The Plan” sponsored by a group called Anonymous…a very unusual video. I have not heard of it but seems to be a significant movement… Does anyone know what it is about? The video, while talking about taking back our power and finding freedom, had a dark tone to it.

    Like

  23. Denise and all…

    Denise, you said “Those times, those phases where you/me/all of us are on the floor and at the end of our ropes is the Alchemical process at it’s finest and most transformational moments. Again, harsh but true.”

    Thank you. I am on the floor whining, crying, hurting, aching, hopeless… and and and… so much has happened in the last two weeks that it seems like a year of living…. Oh wait… it is, uh, was, or maybe it was a whole century. Remember “Crack the Whip”? in some torturous PE class in some long ago rainy day gymnasium… I always ended up being the poor little shit on the end of the whip. Right now I feel like that. I’ve been keeping my figurative mouth shut around here because I felt like everyone else was moving on and I wasn’t … just mired down in more 3D bullshit mixed in with molasses and concrete…

    Thank you for writing this one. Thank you for sharing what you have shared….

    From one “whiny little monkey” to all you other “whiny little monkeys”, keep your light shining… that is the only way we’ll find each other in the fog ,,,

    Deb

    Like

  24. Dear Denise,

    Deeply thanking you for your reply, the wording of which “hit home” completely. Reading your words was like the final crucial push to open a door that had been unlocked yet stuck. How clearly has it been staring me at the face that “karma” has been reduced to “sin” in the Western speak – you helped me further reconnect with the whole enormous multidimensionality of this task. Particularly your use of the word FLUID – I felt my energy field expand and suddenly opening up to contain so much more, triggered by that one single word! In me, there really are no words to describe how much this means to me. Particularly today being a portal day, this new comprehension feels specifically timed. So sending you much Heart Light in appreciation.

    I also worry, how many knocks and punches you must be taking, writing to us about all of this. I recognise that you buffer the rest of us by not letting the Dark through, keeping the Light of this space for safe sharing. The knowledge you reveal here, particularly recently, must certainly anger many. Having experienced some of those type of energies in the past week, I wondered if it’s a general, increased wave again to squash Light where found.

    A vision came to me earlier today, which I feel compelled to share. Since the 5D is about unity and people looking out for each other, I would like to do this with you all who share here – my vision was this: We all here extending our “energy hand”, joining into a circle, and letting our High Heart Light flow through us (FLUID!) around the circle to support each other and uplift everyone. This is how I see this space to be, together we will feel strong, when individually we feel wary. We may be physically all around the world and alone, but in 5D we’re not.

    Wishing you Denise, and everyone here a Light-filled portal day ♥♥♥

    Like

    • mia,

      Thank you sweetie for even thinking about how the lower negative ones take aim at me. Hugs for that but it’s so much better than it’s ever been before. And, with much difficulty, I’ve finally learned how to hit the delete button at TRANSITIONS to just not allow certain Comments in here. Time’s too short and important at this late date to mess with that type of stuff…so I don’t. :)

      Every time a group of us makes another transition into more Light (within ourselves I mean), the lower frequency everything/everyone takes great offense and lashes out in an attempt to stop or at least derail or slow down the entire Process of Ascension. Don’t buy into any of this and just keep your Heart on the High goal…the only goal.

      Yes your vision is very much how 5D and Unity Consciousness or unified, integrated, ascended High Heart Consciousness is. Ever wonder why the majority of channeled beings are a small group of higher dimensional beings? It’s because, at a certain level of spiritual development within 5D and higher, many like-souls who’ve ascended are naturally attracted to each other and many of them become these “groups” of very wise and amazing but still evolving souls (the continued Path back towards connecting with more aspects of Source.)

      This 5D (and higher) process is like a growing spiritual, energetic, consciousness network where more beings deliberately connect to other like-beings to consciously create and co-create and assist or teach others. With our ascension/evolution into 5D, we too are beginning to feel and perceive this very normal 5D trait that’s being called “Unity Consciousness” within ourselves but ALSO with other like-souls, with other like-frequency, like-consciousness people. We’re beginning to experience this 5D network type of consciousness and new way of living and being. Many of the readers here have done this, experienced this many times already, and today – 7-11-11 portal – it’s evolved up a few more Energy Stair Steps and we’ve been feeling this the past week or few days.

      Gratitude to mia and everyone else for your High Heart Unity Consciousness and perceiving this 5D networking or Aquarian grouping energy and awareness. This 5D unity consciousness will only grow and expand the more we individually do. Aquarius/Leo…Uranus/Sun. :)

      Hugs,
      Denise

      Like

  25. Hi Denise and Mia – loved your posts and your vision of all of us supporting each other. It’s been a rough couple of days and embracing all of you is so uplifting. I’ve been whiney and grumpy (ok, all of the above). So bad I’ve been thinking maybe I should see a doctor, maybe I need anti-whiney monkey medication!!! I seriously don’t want to go that route, I’m seeing so so many people medicating themselves with drugs, booze, whatever, just to get through it. I’ve become so sensitive that I can’t even have a glass of wine any more without feeling terrible.
    So today is a portal day – that explains a lot. Thanks Denise. Love you gurl. And I hope the love you feel from all of us helps keep you strong against the negative shit that gets flung at you. xoxo

    Like

    • chrysalis55,

      Hugs of Gratitude back at you dear Heart.

      Another aspect of the Ascension Process is all of us not being able to tolerate any/all of the lower frequency, lower consciousness BS in all its many diverse forms. And, something I’ve always fought against and tried to teach or explain at TRANSITIONS is that we do not have to look like or sound like angelic beings while we’re going through this incredibly difficult and painful transformation Ascension process!

      There’s a lot of past collective christian religious beliefs – plus “new age” beliefs and lofty, angelic-like, aren’t I perfect and divine” type of BS and distortions – that it’s not acceptable to look and sound like you’re having a difficult or painful time while spiritually growing. Nothing could be farther from the truth. The shortest and fastest way through these intense inner transformational phases is right into and through it all. Feel it, deal with it so you can quickly move beyond it and to the next phase and the next and the next…until what’s left inside us is so small and picked-over that it’s gone dormant.

      This is why it’s important for all of us to allow ourselves to feel miserable, to feel the pain, to feel the anger, to feel the sadness and repulsion and not worry about not looking, sounding, talking -and in some cases smelling!- like we’re perfect angelic beings while living this incredibly difficult process. Like I said earlier, have a bowl of ice cream, or whatever you can digest and not feel sick from, and cut yourself some slack. We’re all ALLOWED to be “whiny little monkeys” during these mega intense phases of the Ascension Process. :)

      Hugs,
      Denise

      Like

  26. Once again so very grateful for your post Denise, as well as everyone else who is sharing their thoughts and experiences. The past few weeks have been a living hell in so many ways. The pain I’ve been in has been crazy, so bad that I’ve been back and forth from docs to make sure it isn’t anything serious. So far everything is a mystery. People antagonizing me when they know I’m down, I’m reaching that point where I just don’t care anymore, about what people are doing or saying. My tolerance for people is at an all time low. It is best for me to be alone, which is what I crave right now.

    This would all be unbearable, but then I read your post Denise and I felt this wave of recognition within my heart and it brought me to tears. There is a part of me that remembers this it seems, not consciously, but my heart remembers. It is helping pull me through.

    Someone touched upon alternate realities in this thread which really drew my attention. This is something I have been wondering about. I have had dreams of my self in alternate realities. Very strange, I had always wondered if it was possible to observe this realities. Your explanation Denise connected some major dots for me.

    I am now having dreams more often about other lightworkers. I can’t remember the context of my more recent dream, but Denise you were present in one of these dreams. Well not right there, but I was able to feel your presence even though you are on the other side of the country, as well as others whom I could not necessarily name.(perhaps they are others I will meet in the future and connect with?)This is a new one for me. I think I’m comprehending the 5d unity consciousness a little more. I realize it is not something I can understand unless it is experienced.

    I have re-read these threads a few times over the past 2 weeks. And its been helpful to feel connected to others out there going through similar stuff.

    I’ll keep hanging on with you all. Sending love out to you.
    Michelle

    Like

  27. Holy Buckets of Monkey Wine! This discussion has ignited a portal of its own!
    Denise, as always, I commend the timeliness of your commentary, as well that of your readers.

    I have to routinely re-remind myself that I am allowed to feel like shit. In a way, suppose to feel like shit. You can’t heal it until you feel it. The goal is not to feel better, but get better at feeling, as the Wise Ones say. 5-D is about resonance creation, and the more ‘awake’ and conscious we are, the more clearly we are guided by our heart/emotions.

    This process/progress is about purging, cleansing, clearing. Anyone who has ever physically purged something we ingested or were infected by knows it ain’t purty or fun. We can feel just fine in the moments between the gagging and upheaval. Tired, but peaceful, and fully appreciating the lack of nausea and pain. But then comes the next wave, and well, no need for details. It ain’t over ’til it’s over, no matter how awful we feel. But we do know it will end, though we cannot picture surviving yet another purge or surge.

    As for the karma kommentary, again a high five. Karma, as Denise reminded us, is simply polarity for the sake of perception shifts. My wish/hope/goal is that karma in the 5th dimension plays a much lesser role, with lighter, higher energies and consciousness available for an assist in growth. If we are more connected with our Higher Selves, each other and All That Is, we hopefully will not require the balancing techniques that were necessary in 3-D polarity.

    My quote for the day/week/portal: “Do everything with a mind that has let go.” – John Chan.

    Even when we ‘think’ we are stuck, lost, done, failed, we are still moving within the change. We can all admit that every experience we judge to be good, bad or indifferent is within a higher consciousness and awareness than before. With a deeper, more resolute conviction and intention. That alone gets what is to be done, done. So think ye not that nothing has happened or will happen. It has, it is and thy will be done. On earth as it is in ‘heaven…’

    But if you want concrete evidence outside your personal universe, focus on the current plight of Rupert Murdoch, Dark Emperor of Media Misinformation. Miracle of miracles, truth is being set free. This is a purging I can actually watch without wincing.

    Much love, appreciation and respect to us all!

    Like

  28. OMG, I LOVE IT. PUT so simply into a nutshell. We certainly would have spread ourselves far and wide in order to learn the crash course because if there was only ONE aspect at the time here we most propably be still living int the caves with dinosaurs roaming on our foot steps. I cannot even think how long it would take for only one aspect at the time to complete what many, many are now doing. It has taken long enough for all of us here and in the eternal NOW.

    Oh Lordy, bless our hearts and resolve to get things done, pronto.

    Like

  29. My thanks, Denise, for the mention in your post today that so much comment had been added to this earlier entry, which drew me back to it. And your very last observation…

    “There’s a lot of past collective christian religious beliefs – plus “new age” beliefs and lofty, angelic-like, aren’t I perfect and divine” type of BS and distortions – that it’s not acceptable to look and sound like you’re having a difficult or painful time while spiritually growing. Nothing could be farther from the truth.”

    –reminded me, indeed, of the not-so-long-ago shock that everyone felt when it was discovered that Mother Theresa, the just-about saintly (up to that moment) missionary whom everyone regarded as the model to aspire toward was revealed, in her private diary (?), to have left pages and pages of severe self-doubt and agony, nothing of which ever escaped, for notice, into the public life that she led. It certainly bears out what you are saying.

    I certainly appreciate your ability to cut through the fog and the doubt with observations such as these.

    Irv

    Like

  30. Hello, everyone,

    Ah, Lamplighter, talk about purging! I am in the midst of a lung infection which is coughing up all sorts of lovely colors! I’m trying to connect what the lung means symbolically– me not being able to breathe freely in my regular life. Always connected to the throat as well, which, as has been mentioned here before is not being able to speak freely. I’m taking this period of illness as another purging. It sucks though, because I have to travel again tomorrow and work really hard for the next few weeks. Well, today I gave myself permission to come back early if I feel inclined to and just rest or go in another direction.
    True, I’ve been doing too much in the world and some of it is uncomfortable and maddening, but I’ve been noticing a lot more order in this crazy pushy part of Asia I’m living in. For instance, a group of drunk grandmothers I was travelling with this week allowed me to go in turn in a line and did not push past me. I can’t remember when that’s happened before. I also stopped a man from pushing through me with his luggage with a simple, TTTTTT. Just a sound. It also make people laugh around me. Perhaps it’s me that’s causing things to be more orderly now? I’m noticing more respect. Not consistently, but it’s happening where it didn’t before. Very interesting stuff. So, what I’m saying is that I can go out in the world without too much discomfort now– me, an empath! It’s quite a revelation!
    And, although I don’t have a visual of volunteering, the first time I read about that, I was like, Of course and I’m staying for the duration.
    Well, I’m sick and rambling, so will end there.

    Hugs to all (so glad you’re all here),
    Cat

    Like

  31. Cat, I am purging through my nose this week. Allergies like I have not had in years and not responding to my usual address of medication and cleansing. Sneezing so hard and so long that I get dizzy and have to hug the walls. But I will take that over a lung infection; I can still breathe fully, and am ever grateful for that. Hope you are full-lunged very soon.

    One of my other fave muses is Lauren Gorgo. She had quite a bit to say about purging, the waves and its counterpoint; empowerment, especially of the Feminine/Goddess type. Made me think of your drunken grandmother pass… :0)

    http://consciousco-creationalcoaching.blogspot.com/2011/07/love-takes-lead-return-of-feminine.html

    Like

    • Lamplighter,

      Thanks for sharing a link to Lauren Gorgo’s latest article. It was great, plus her clever humor always lifts my spirits. :)

      Gratitude,
      Denise

      Like

  32. Hi Denise, Like Cat I don’t have a memory of volunteering but five years ago I had a vision of being taken to a city underwater and given my invitation to the “new world”. I didn’t understand it then but do you think this is the same thing?

    I love reading this site – so much more in common with all these strangers I’ve never met than with old friends. I can finally allow myself to believe that this is real.

    Michelle – I have also dreamed of being in different dimensions – twice in the past two months. First I was being shown how to transform myself into a ball of energy and then travelled to another dimension with another being – I had a job to do there but I have no idea what it was and to be honest I don’t believe I managed it. I think I still have a lot of fear and scepticism in me ( not intentionally – but I think it bleeds through unwittingly) I want to change that but don’t know how.
    Second dream I went to alternate dimension and met my real family. I don’t think I made a great impression on them – I seem to have a fundamental lack of trust in myself that doesn’t allow me to see this through. Sometimes so close but no cigar!
    I feel like I am messing up with this ascension process when I want to stay the course – what can I do to help this along? any suggestions welcome.

    Thanks again Denise I need this site to maintain my sanity and belief in this process.

    With metta, Kit

    Ps. how many of us (sensitives) do you reckon there are in the world? because I don’t know any around me.

    Like

  33. Hi Denise.

    Just a few words to let you know how much I feel you/You/YOU as being part of the same “team” as I am. Although I am deadly weary for the last weeks with very few moments of bliss I choose to not wait until I get some strength to cope with the 3D pressure that is actually getting more toxic than never to appreciate and value your work holdign this site and your very presence on earth. As a First Waver, having started my physical ascension in 1987 I sometimes surprise myself thinking that it is really surreal that we are still having a physical body! I can suscribe each one of your words about the trapping and being unable to move to a lighter/loving/unity consciousness physical environment and being forced to survive in the middle of the 3D insanity that is apparently taking over. At this very moment I’m just feeling as if I/we were some kind of a kamikaze guided and supported by sheer Will, Self Will, because nothing feels remotely good and the people we are surronded by are DF puppets…AND instead of being stopped by this we get some strenght from nowhere/Source and go ahead creating heaven on earth. What I’m strongly feeling for the last weeks is that we must take a step in removing any remaining inner attitude of waiting for any external source to confirm what we/We/WE know in our hearts to be true. The plan now has entered a new phase and it is for us to take the stance that we have inside the inner structures (remember Pluto in Capricorn?) of the new earth, the new society, the new ethics, the new kind of relationships, that we intuitively KNOW how all of this IS and follow our hints and feelings rooted in this new stance.

    Love and Gratitude Denise, and everyone of you. The family is reuniting.

    Adriana.

    Like

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